Top 1. 0 Effects of Porn on Your Brain, Your Marriage, and Your Sex Life. The effects of porn are devastating. Pornography is ravaging marriages. In our culture porn is treated as if it’s harmless, but it’s not. Porn will wreck the arousal process in your brain and end up wrecking your sex life in marriage.

I receive emails everyday from women who are desperate to fix their marriages, but they don’t know what to do. They married men who never seem to want sex. Or their husbands are never satisfied. Or their husbands call them boring or unattractive. And the root of many of these problems is porn. Here’s the really devastating part: Because so much of what porn does to you happens chemically in the brain, the porn use doesn’t have to be going on NOW to have these effects. A boy who grew up on porn in his teens, and then managed to stop watching it in his twenties (with occasional relapses) will still suffer from many of these things.

The good news: There is healing! You can rebuild those chemical pathways to arousal. But first we have to understand 1. And so today, on Top 1. Tuesday, I thought I’d share: And remember–women use porn, too!

While some of these apply just to men, many of them apply to both genders. For sources of these claims, see the graphic at the bottom of the post. They’re all listed there. Porn Means You Can’t Get Aroused by “Just” Your Spouse. Do you remember reading about Pavlov and his dog in Psychology?

Pavlov would give the dog a nice juicy steak, but right before he did he would ring a bell. He conditioned the dog to associate ringing the bell with getting great food. Eventually Pavlov took the food away, but kept ringing the bell. The dog kept salivating at the bell, even though there was no steak, because the dog associated the bell with the food. The same thing happens when we see porn. Porn stimulates the arousal centers in the brain. When it’s accompanied by orgasm (sexual release through masturbation), then a chemical reaction happens and hormones are released.

In effect, our brains start to associate arousal with an image, an idea, or a video, rather than a person. When you don’t watch porn and save yourself until marriage, then all of those chemicals and hormones are released for the first time when you’re with your spouse, and it causes you to bond intensely (and sexually) to your spouse. But when you spend a ton of time teaching your brain to associate arousal and release with pornography, your brain can’t associate arousal and release with a person anymore.

Either you have to fantasize about the porn, and get those images in your brain, or you have to watch porn first. Often people can “complete the act”, but it’s not intense for them the way porn is. You’ve rewired your brain, and now you’re salivating at the wrong thing.

1. Directed by Kent Faulcon. With Carol Abney, Eddie Alfano, Ivan Basso, Alex Boling. When a small town teacher mistakes the hit-man hired to kill her for her long lost.
2. Anna Fitzgerald looks to earn medical emancipation from her parents who until now have relied on their youngest child to help their leukemia-stricken daughter Kate.
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Porn Wrecks Your Libido. It’s only natural, then, that many people who use porn in the past, or who use porn in the present, have virtually no libido when it comes to making love to their spouse. Watch Gator Hindi Full Movie.

The spouse is not what turns them on, and so the natural drive that we have for sex is transferred somewhere else. I get so many emails from young women in their twenties who say, “my husband and I were both virgins when we married, and I thought he’d want sex all the time.

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But after our honeymoon sex went to maybe twice a month, and that’s only if I pressure him. He says he just isn’t interested.” With so many men growing up on porn, this is just to be expected. Porn Makes You Sexually Lazy.

In porn, everyone is turned on all the time. You don’t have to make any effort to arouse someone; it’s automatic. There is no foreplay in porn.

And so if your spouse isn’t aroused  you start to think that it’s somehow their fault. There’s no expectation that we will have to “woo” someone or be affectionate and help jumpstart that arousal process. It’s almost as if we approach sex as two different beings and we’re just using each other, rather than thinking of each other. And thus we never learn how to please the other or become a good lover because we’re always thinking that the other is somehow “frigid”. Pornography teaches you that sex is about getting my needs met; it isn’t about meeting someone else’s needs or experiencing something wonderful together.

Porn Turns “Making Love” into a Foreign Concept. Those arousal centers and pleasure centers in our brain are supposed to associate sex with physical pleasure and a real sense of intimacy. But the intimacy doesn’t happen with porn, and so the pleasure is all that registers. Thus, porn makes sex all about the body, and not about intimacy. In fact, the idea of being intimate isn’t even sexy anymore; anonymous is what’s sexy.

We may call “having sex” “making love”, but in reality they aren’t necessarily the same thing. Someone who has used porn extensively often has a difficult time experiencing any intimacy during sex, because those arousal and pleasure centers zero in only on the body. And that’s another negative effect of porn: porn users often need to objectify or degrade their partner in order to achieve pleasure, the exact opposite of intimacy. God made sex to actually unite us and draw us together; He even gave us a bonding hormone that’s released at orgasm so that we’d feel closer! But if that hormone is released when no one is present, it stops having its effects.

Sex no longer bonds you together. Porn Makes Regular Intercourse Seem Boring.

An alcoholic drinks alcohol for the “buzz”. But after a while your body begins to tolerate it. To get the same buzz, you need more alcohol. And so the alcoholic begins to drink harder liquor, or drink larger quantities. The same thing happens with porn. Because porn teaches us that sex is all about the body, and not about intimacy, then the only way to get a greater “high” or that same buzz is to watch weirder and weirder porn.

I think most of us would be horrified if we saw what most porn today really is. It isn’t just pictures of naked women like there used to be in Playboy; most is very violent, extremely degrading, and very ugly.“Regular” intercourse is actually not depicted that often in porn, and so quite frequently the person who watches porn starts to get a warped view of what sex really is. And often they start to want weirder and weirder things. Now, I’m not against spicing things up, and I do think lots of things can be fun! But when we’re wanting “more” because we’ve programmed ourselves to think “the weirder the sexier”, there’s a problem. Porn Makes it Hard to Be Tender When You Have Sex.

I'm Still Not Over.. My Sister's Keeper'[SPOILERS follow, although if you’ve yet to see My Sister’s Keeper, you’re not missing anything.]When I first read My Sister’s Keeper, I was devastated. The tale, told from multiple points of view, centers on a teenager with leukemia, Kate, and her younger sister, Anna, who was conceived solely to be a possible donor match for her dying big sister. But one summer, following many painful procedures, Anna decides she doesn’t want to be part of her sister’s medical treatments anymore and sues her parents for medical emancipation. The whole family struggles with the fact that if Anna stops her treatments, Kate will die.

The book grapples with big questions about medical ethics and family responsibilities. It’s a gripping, emotional read, especially in the final pages where, after it comes out that Anna is only stopping the treatments at Kate’s wishes, a judge emancipates Anna from her parents, allowing the choice to be hers. Shortly after that, readers learn that Anna died in a freak car accident, and her kidney was donated to Kate after all — who now, years later, is healthy but without her sister. It was a great book, and with a cast of compelling characters, it could have been a phenomenal movie — but instead, the 2. Nick Cassavetes (The Notebook) and starring Cameron Diaz as the mom and Abigail Breslin as Anna, was a total hacky mess because someone at the studio had the bright idea to totally change the ending (over complaints from book author Jodi Picoult).

The film has Kate, not Anna, pass away in the shocking final moments, thereby changing the entire trajectory of the story. Any theme about the fragility and randomness of life one could read onto the tale was totally shot — or at least misdirected.

I’m not someone who gets hung up on small book- to- movie changes; I get that it’s a different medium, and it’s often impossible to keep everything the same. Plenty of changes to the movie — like aging down Anna and changing the gender of Judge De Salvo — I didn’t love but took as operating costs to make a better film. Monkey Up Full Movie In English. But drastically changing the ending of a story is beyond the pale. The overly manipulative movie wasn’t well reviewed (it got a 4. Rotten Tomatoes) and didn’t fare particularly well at the box office, likely because the emotional impact of the story is totally lost when the girl you expected to die the whole time dies at the end. Just think if this becomes commonplace. What if studio heads thought they knew best about everything (Ha!), and regularly changed beloved book plot points that they thought would be hard to sell?

What if Lisbeth Salander became more upbeat? What if Dumbledore didn’t die in the Harry Potter films because everyone really liked him?

What if in Dear John, John and Savannah had a Hollywood ending and would up together after all? Oh, wait.)My Sister’s Keeper is always my go- to example for a book that I loved that the film version totally ruined. I bring this up now because — while thankfully there has been no evidence to support this — I’m very afraid that a movie studio will mess with the ending of another beloved book that has its fair share of tragic death: The Fault in Our Stars, coming to theaters next June.

I get that it can be tempting to want to make a movie version of a story “your own” and not want to just copy the book. But studios need to realize they aren’t being creative, they’re just pissing off their most eager customers. Learn from the My Sister’s Keeper disaster. In cases of big endings, stick to the damn book.